Friday, June 23, 2006

an M3 in 3 days

i got an extra white coat. some black pens. had all my doctor-y clothes dry cleaned. the car is getting a very expensive tune-up. i read first aid for the wards and how to be a truly excellent junior medical student. i'm taking ACLS this weekend. all of this to be totally prepared for rotations.

but really i'm not prepared at all. i feel woefully inadequate for what i'm about to start. i am about as anxious as i was in the days before i started med school, although i haven't gotten a rash. yet.

it helps to relax at home, doing little but watching tv and catching up on world news. i felt like a loser for not going out all day at first, but after spending the last two years feeling like a different person and wondering when i'll get myself back, i know that part of me is gone forever. that's not just a function of being in med school, it's just being a grown-up.

i know where i will be on monday. i called yesterday and i will be on the endocrine service. i'm technically supposed to be doing general internal medicine, but that's how things go sometimes. the upside is that the attendings for this service consistently get positive comments in evals and everyone emphasizes how much they enjoy teaching students in a non-stressful environment.

i just might survive. wish me luck.

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